final chapter of Selena City

[miriam_e]

Not sure about this. It was the second thing I mapped out when I came up with the story more than a year ago. In writing this today from those old notes I found a lot of things had changed, though mostly it flowed pretty-much as I'd originally intended. My initial wish was to have the ending paragraphs as I've written them here, but I'm finding it hard to get perspective. Does it work? Or is the end stupid? Is the whole final chapter a mistake? I have no idea.

There were a couple of other things I wanted to put in, but they got squeezed out... oh well... maybe they'll make it into the rewrites.

I'm exhausted. I should have spent a couple of days on this instead of pushing it all into today. Doesn't bode well for next NaNo. [gulp]

Anyway... this final chapter:
http://miriam-english.org/stories/selena/18-solution.html

The index page for the whole thing:
http://miriam-english.org/stories/selena/index.html

Let me know what you think.

Comments

[cranky--crocus.livejournal.com]

Oh great G's and G's I've just realized I really have to read the whole thing again to get the best picture of it. Giggles. I'll have to find time to do that, really!

I'm also wondering how you've ended it. I'll have to see when I get to it. I'm fascinated by how others end stories. Sometimes I'm good, sometimes I'm rubbish. My first one ended well in that horrible fluff-romance way (which was what the novel was) and the second one I didn't finish. The third one, which I did, ended crap--but it was also hard because I was ending the BOOK but not the STORY, and now I know there's so much I missed temporarily ending, and I'll have to add loads to the ending. That's been awkward.

[miriam-e.livejournal.com]

heheheh :) There's no rush. I'm not really expecting anybody to read the ending. I know my Mum will, but that's cos she's my Mum -- Mums do that. :)

Ending stories terrifies me. I hate having to try and pull the threads together or looking for a satisfying finish. One day I'll write a story that starts nowhere, doesn't accomplish anything, and which finishes with everything left up in the air. It would be a terribly unsatisfying story to read, but so much more realistic to write.

I hope you have more luck with your stories than I do with mine. Being much younger, with a good and flexible brain, you have the great advantage of being able to learn and adapt more quickly and easily, sprouting forests of fresh neural connections. I'm looking forward to seeing what comes from your bright mind.

[miriam-e.livejournal.com]

I like fluffy romance. :)
Is the one you refer to above online somewhere? (If you feel uncomfortable about giving the address here, perhaps email me the address.)

[cranky--crocus.livejournal.com]

Yeah, Mums do have a habit of doing such things. Smiles. I should send my whole novel off to Mum. She's been reading it but I've been slow in putting it up because no one was really reading it save my best friend (best friends also do that). I should just send the entire thing off.

That would be a very satisfying story, with a story starting no where and ends without accomplishment or a proper tie-in. I would actually enjoy reading that.

You seem to be having good luck with your stories! What are you trying to do with them?

I just like writing for me. It's loads of fun to have so many worlds in my head to visit, and so many characters that I've created and become well acquainted with.

[cranky--crocus.livejournal.com]

It isn't online somewhere--I've thought about it but it's so old I haven't--but I would be willing to send it.

IF...
Would you promise not to laugh at it? I wrote it when I was fifteen basically in three days, ten thousand words a night after school before homework. So it's no good but can be a fun read and is just a nice happy ending fluff fiction.

I would be willing to email it if you thought you could get through it despite grammar issues and general plot badness because it hasn't been edited or touched since I wrote it years ago.

[miriam-e.livejournal.com]

I just downloaded all the chapters you have online of Providential Horn/Horned Fate a couple of days ago because I'd resolved to read the rest of it on my little Palm computer. I'd started reading the story some time back when you began posting it, but had to stop as this medication makes me so tired I must either write OR read; not both. Will you be putting the rest of the story online at some point?

I'm not really trying to do anything with my stories yet. Mostly I'm just trying to learn. I've written short stories since I was in primary school, but until recently never attempted anything long. It turns out NaNoWriMo has been the most awesome learning experience for me. Next year I'm hoping to illustrate one of my stories... not sure which one yet.

[miriam-e.livejournal.com]

I would love to read it. And I promise not to laugh. I'm certain I'll be impressed. I'm already amazed that you could write 10,000 words a night before homework. What a fertile mind! Keep up that level of productivity and there'll never be any stopping you.

I struggle to push out a couple of thousand words a day even when I've managed to get rid of all other commitments!!!

[cranky--crocus.livejournal.com]

I wonder if I'm going to put the rest of the story online, since it takes so long and people aren't really reading anyway. Maybe some day. But I could send you the file of the novel I have on my computer if you'd like it!

I've been writing short stories and novels and poems and songs and whatever else my entire life. I wonder what inspired me to write so young. It was probably the combination of my being an incredibly independent and private person likely to be alone and my very active imagination. I always had many friends in my head.

[cranky--crocus.livejournal.com]

Alright! I'll send them over to you, then. I doubt you'll be impressed but at least it can be a fun read sometimes. I'm amazed I could write 10,000 words a night before homework as well. I don't doubt I could still do it, though. Last November I was sick one of the first days of NaNo and I might have cranked out 13,000 words, but I'm not sure. It could have been 6,000 and then soon many more. I can sit down and write quickly without stopping. That's what makes me wonder if I could be a writer--even if I didn't write well, writing quickly can be a great asset in the market.

[dorjejaguar.livejournal.com]

It's all fascinating to me.
The end is quite lovely.
So yes, it does work, there's only one word in the whole thing that didn't feel like it fit to me, here:
"Among them was the weird impression that he had been reciting something he'd memorised, something that had been scripted for him. "
The word "weird" sounds too much like an apology more than puzzlement. Just my opinion of course. Which means only as much as you want it to mean.
Anyway, thank you. :)

[miriam-e.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the comment. I'm glad you liked the end. (I still can get perspective on it!)

You're right "weird" does seem to be the wrong word. I'll change that.

I'm very grateful to you.

[dorjejaguar.livejournal.com]

:) You're welcome, of course.

A tour de force!

[revbobbob.livejournal.com]

I love it! So many things I want to say, but can't for fear of spoiling it for people. It absolutely worked, down to the last second, the final period.

I'll write you as soon as I can get email working. I hadn't been in touch while you published the last chapters because of the death of my craptop (display died). Now I'm back from the shadows again, and if you could please tell me where Insurance" is. It died along with my old computer and all the addresses I stored there.

So when is the new one going to get finished?

Your adoring fan,

Bob Hussein Crispen

Re: A tour de force!

[miriam-e.livejournal.com]

Wow! Thanks Bob. I'm gobsmacked. Thank you.
Gosh.

http://miriam-english.org/stories/insurance_v02.html
It is not a terrific story though. It reads better if you think of it as a series of short stories, which is really what it is. It was my first, rather naive attempt to write long form. I had no idea it was so different from the short stories I've always written. So... it really came out as a series of shorts. I'm hoping to exploit that in the near future after I fix the weak parts, and maybe turn it into a series of comix... or maybe Ren'ai. I wish I could make it as VR fiction, but that scene seems to have pretty-much caved in... apart from Blender.

A week and a half to this year's NaNoWriMo. I'd been compiling notes over the past several months, but got jittery in the last few days and may be throwing all my preparation out in favor of another story idea I stumbled upon a couple of months ago. Eeeek! Such a change at the eleventh hour is not good for the nerves.

Still... I have to remind myself that I do NaNo to teach myself, and failing is a legitimate part of learning. The medication I'm on for this damn infection means I'll likely be too tired to complete the story in the month, but I don't care. I've decided to keep going in December till it is done. :)

This story (if I go for the alternate one) won't be science fiction. We'll see how well it goes. [gulp]

Thanks so much for reading Bob. I'm truly eternally grateful.

Hope your computer troubles are behind you.

Re: A tour de force!

[miriam-e.livejournal.com]

I've decided to make Insurance available directly from my site so people no longer need to ask for the "secret" address. After re-reading it I'm no longer quite as embarrassed by its faults.

Just go to http://miriam-english choose the link to stories and scroll down to the Insurance link.

I'll still fix it sometime... maybe next year.