bash.org

[miriam_e]

I archived all my old LiveJournal entries yesterday and while that was happening I browsed them randomly. I found my entry for 2004-09-01 about how much I'd laughed and laughed reading http://bash.org

So I checked it out again. It is a great way to waste time. Many hours later and after many tears of laughter I feel sated.

Here are a few of the nuttier quotes:

---

Rabidplaybunny87: Okay, so my neighbors officially hate me
GarbageStan23: why?
Rabidplaybunny87: Well, me, david and andrew were having a bonfire in the backyard, and we were making s'mores and all... and suddenly we here sirens, and see a firetruck turn into the street in front of us.
Rabidplaybunny87: So we all went running to see what was up, and our neigbor's house was on fire!
GarbageStan23: oh shit!
Rabidplaybunny87: Yeah, and when we got there, the wife was crying into her husbands arms, and we were just kinda standing there, and then she saw us, and then like for 10 seconds, gave us the dirtiest look ever
Rabidplaybunny87: Turns out, we were still holding our sticks with marshmallows on it, watching the fire....
Rabidplaybunny87: talk about bad timing...

---

<Jeedo> hey baby, whats up?
<Indidge> umm....nothing?
<Jeedo> So....want me to like come over today so we can fuck?
<Indidge> Wait....did you want to speak to my daughter?
<Jeedo> Yes Mrs.Miller.. :-/

---

<[TN]FBMachine> i got kicked out of barnes and noble once for moving all the bibles into the fiction section

---

<UKDJ|Planet> I swear to god
<UKDJ|Planet> I've just heard a duck tell a joke
<Jock> o...k
<UKDJ|Planet> there was as group of ducks on a pond near where i live
<UKDJ|Planet> one of the ducks was quacking away looking straight at a group of like 10 ducks
<UKDJ|Planet> then he stopped and all the other ducks went mental
<UKDJ|Planet> it looked just like duck stand-up comedy

---

<xxxGirlygirlxxx> Thank you for listening to me.
<xxxGirlygirlxxx> You know your a really good listener.
<xxxGirlygirlxxx> Sweety please say something.
<Sandaedar> Ok I'm back.

---

<NHBoy> I broke my G-string while fingering a minor :(
<rycool> ...
<NHBoy> I was trying to play Knocking on Heaven's Door.
<NHBoy> Oh well, time to buy new strings.

---

<DigiGnome> Real life should have a fucking search function, or something.
<DigiGnome> I need my socks.

---

<Malagmyr> This linguistics professor was lecturing the class.
<Malagmyr> "In English," he explained, "a double negative forms a positive. In some languages, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative."
<Malagmyr> "However," the professor continued, "there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative."
<Malagmyr> Immediately, a voice from the back of the room piped up: "Yeah..... right...."

---

<xxx> I think I'm having some problems with my sexlife...
<phunqe> oh? :/
<xxx> Yeah, yesterday my girlfriend and I wanted to have sex, but I had a... hmm.. well you know.. problem..
<phunqe> Ah, no ping reply?

---

Soth: i need something more complex than 2+2
jadenbane: Soth: 2+2i ?

---

<erno> hm. I've lost a machine.. literally _lost_. it responds to ping, it works completely, I just can't figure out where in my apartment it is.

Comments

[satyapriya.livejournal.com]

I had something like that a while ago. TeenGirl went to have a bath so I used her internet connection to check some email. Guess msn messenger still registered as her because one of her friends pinged me. Said hi, and then proceeded to chat in inbelievably foul language. This went on for a bit, until I said: "You know this is SatyaPriya, not TeenGirl".
"Get the **** off" was the reply, several times over, when I insisted.
Then I replied "No, look, I'm spelling correctly and using the Queen's English."
TG's friend suddenly went silent, then disappeared off the net.

[miriam-e.livejournal.com]

heheheh :)
That might have the good side effect of causing TG's friend be a little more considered in the way they talk.